PARENT QUESTION: When going shopping and your child wants a toy, what do you do?
ANSWER: I don’t know the age of your child, but when I think of it, it really doesn’t matter! I always think it’s best to let your child know what to expect BEFORE you go into the store. When you’re still in the parking lot let them know if it will be a “looking day” or a “buying day”. That way they know what to expect and you know how you’ll follow through. You won’t be pressured because you’ve already said what was going to happen and you need to stick with it! You may be tempted to give in, but don’t! Especially at the stage when you’re trying to teach your child the difference. Once your child behaves well when you say no, then you’ll be able to be more flexible in the future. This takes time though!
You don’t want to buy something every time that you go because they’ll just expect it. Be prepared for a crying tantrum! Just know that you’ll leave as quickly as you can and ignore it the best that you can. Yes, it’s really embarrassing when your child is kicking, screaming and demanding, but just about every other parent that’s watching your child’s tantrum has been there and really feels sorry for what you’re going through! If the tantrum works and you give in, then that’s what you’ll get in the future…..more tantrums!
If you expect a tantrum, you may want to make a few “practice” shopping trips. By that I mean go to the store and buy something that you may need but isn’t urgent that you have. If you have to leave without paying and abandon your shopping cart it’s easier! Your child will quickly learn that you mean what you say!
If your child does well a few times, you may choose to go to a dollar store and tell them it’s a buying trip. If you plan on doing that and tell them that they can get one item, stick to it! It’s very tempting when it’s only a dollar to let them choose a few things but what happens is that it makes them in charge again! BEFORE you go in, tell them it’s a buying trip and that they can choose ONE toy. If they try to bargain for another, let them know that you may be able to get it on the next buying trip. If they throw a fit, just put down the toy you were going to get and LEAVE! You don’t have to do that more than once or twice for your child to get the message loud and clear!
ANSWER: I don’t know the age of your child, but when I think of it, it really doesn’t matter! I always think it’s best to let your child know what to expect BEFORE you go into the store. When you’re still in the parking lot let them know if it will be a “looking day” or a “buying day”. That way they know what to expect and you know how you’ll follow through. You won’t be pressured because you’ve already said what was going to happen and you need to stick with it! You may be tempted to give in, but don’t! Especially at the stage when you’re trying to teach your child the difference. Once your child behaves well when you say no, then you’ll be able to be more flexible in the future. This takes time though!
You don’t want to buy something every time that you go because they’ll just expect it. Be prepared for a crying tantrum! Just know that you’ll leave as quickly as you can and ignore it the best that you can. Yes, it’s really embarrassing when your child is kicking, screaming and demanding, but just about every other parent that’s watching your child’s tantrum has been there and really feels sorry for what you’re going through! If the tantrum works and you give in, then that’s what you’ll get in the future…..more tantrums!
If you expect a tantrum, you may want to make a few “practice” shopping trips. By that I mean go to the store and buy something that you may need but isn’t urgent that you have. If you have to leave without paying and abandon your shopping cart it’s easier! Your child will quickly learn that you mean what you say!
If your child does well a few times, you may choose to go to a dollar store and tell them it’s a buying trip. If you plan on doing that and tell them that they can get one item, stick to it! It’s very tempting when it’s only a dollar to let them choose a few things but what happens is that it makes them in charge again! BEFORE you go in, tell them it’s a buying trip and that they can choose ONE toy. If they try to bargain for another, let them know that you may be able to get it on the next buying trip. If they throw a fit, just put down the toy you were going to get and LEAVE! You don’t have to do that more than once or twice for your child to get the message loud and clear!
